Write with wine and edit with coffee

"Life was meant to be; fun, easy and abundant"

Some days I do think the Cosmic Jokester (some of you call him God) really loves me and wants me to be happy!   To explain first let me tell you a little story...

One night I was at home alone with my wine and a movie.   Truth be told the wine was so fine that I had consumed more than my usual allotment (never mind I'm telling you what that is).   I had left my laptop on and several times heard that little sound that tells you that you have a message.   I decided to check it as I had been sharing messages earlier with an attractive lady.

As I made my way to the computer I was aware of the wine's effect on me.   However, I was enjoying it immensely so I brought my traveling companion (a glass of wine) with me.   Sure enough Ms Beautiful was messaging me again.   As I consumed my fine wine, we exchanged what I thought was some very creative and hillarious messages. 

The next morning when I awoke with a cloudy brain I suddently remembered our messaging from the previous night.   Oh no, I thought, I wonder if I blew it?    In my morning stupor I lay in bed thinking what stupid things I might have said.   So I got up and headed to the computer to check the sent messages, afraid of what I might find.    We all know (at least those of us who enjoy the bubbly) that when intoxicated we can say and do stupid things.   So what did I find?

I'm brilliant when I'm all winned up!   Ok, my spelling goes downhill and punctuation was perverse.   But what the hey,   it made sense and it did qualify I thought, as...witty and creative!   She'll never know my condition at the time (unless she reads this).

Now here's where it gets interesting...

This morning I stumbled upon a research article that states that we ARE more creative when we are drunk or sleepy.   Some of the great writers from the past like Hemmingway knew this.  That brilliant writer is quoted as saying....'Write drunk, edit sober''.   But I'm sure the prudes of the day scoffed at their inebriated claims.  

Here is how it works..

Your brain when its functioning normally ignores ideas and connections that are not likely solutions.  This is because there is just so much information to consider that it would be inefficient to consider what we know is obviously wrong.   However when it comes to creative work our brains work better without that kind of focus.   It's when we are open to all things that the creative connections are made.  And when we are under the influence our mind has difficulty staying on a narrow focus like we do when thinking annalytically sober. 

How much more creative?

In the study 43% of the sober subjects solved the puzzles given.   Now hold onto your wine glass for this....the drinkers solved 82% of the puzzles.   Doesn't that just rock your boat?  Almost twice as good at creative problem solving as our sober friends!   Really this shouldn't come as that big of a surprise since we all know we feel smarter (and better looking) when we are drinking.

Now when it comes to editing we need that sober brain.  Mine is sharper after it has been jolted with my morning java.   Soooo that is why I say.........write with wine and edit with coffee.

The bad news...

No I'm not going to talk about the evils of wine or any other spiked beverage.    No, the bad news is that the researchers got the same kind of result with subjects who were distracted by being over tired.  Again the brain finds it difficult to ignore the unlikely thoughts and associations that a sober and well rested brain would normally do.   Damn....were's the fun in that?

Time for some mind reading..

You big brain is left with the burning question....was he drinking when he wrote this?    The answer is...you're bonkers if you think I'll tell you!

P.S. One night mi amigo Juan Pedro and I were being very friendly with the vino and were having a spritited creative conversation.   Knowing that we wouldn't remember our creative solutions in the morning, I got pen and paper to record our brilliance.   Great thoughts flowed and by the time we stumbled off to bed, I was satisfied we had solved most of the worlds problems.   The next morning I hurried to the family room to retrive the previous nights insights.   There it was one entire nights recordings....only one problem....I couldn't read the chicken scrawl that was my polluted penmanship!

  

You matter when?

You matter when....

When you love the work you do and the people you do it with.

When you are so gracious, generous and aware that you think of other people before yourself.

You are the problem solver not the problem creator.

When you leave the world a better place than you found it.

When you continue to raise the bar on what you do and how you do it.

When you teach and forgive before you rush to judge and demean.

When you touch the people in your life through your actions (and your words).

When kids grow up wanting to be you (or inspired by you).

When someone knows you love them unconditionally.

When you see the world as it is but insist on making it more like it coul be.

When you inspire a Nobel prize winner or a slum dweller.

When the room brightens when you walk in.

When you give someone you total undivided attention.

And when the legacy you leave behind lasts for hours, days or a lifetime.

When you cause someone to have a good belly laugh.

CONFESSION TIME; I swiped this from Seth Godin's excellent blog and then snuck in a few of my own!

Your turn.....what would you add to the list?

Ask the guru?

Are you in on the joke too?

Did you ever get the feeling that this life is just one big joke, being played out at your expense?

Some things just don't seem to make sense. Here is a short list, that I've been contemplating...

*The best way to conquer your enemies....is to love them.
*To find God....stop looking.
*To gain wisdom....stop thinking.
*To feel wealthy....give it away.
*To gain more influence....place other people's interests first.

(that list looks like future articles for me to write...hmmm)

At times life just doesn't seem logical and maybe that's why so many people struggle. But what if it's all just a big joke? What if there is a God (or Goddess, women like to have fun too) and he or she gets together with their amigos to have some fun with us little people down here?

Now things would start to make sense to me! For instance...some years ago, I was listening to a speaker promoting his memory course. He demonstrated his craft by memorizing the names of every person in the room (there were about 50 of us) plus some details about each of us. And this was just for starters, the guy was amazing, he had all kinds of memory tricks....I was impressed!

So I plunked down my 100 bucks. After all as my friends know I tend to have a suspect memory. If I get really involved in something I can forget seemingly small details like picking up my son after school.

Anyway, I was conjuring up in my mind all the benefits and how I would impress my friends with my new display of memory skills. They were going to impressed next week after I graduated from the course. There was only one problem....I forgot to go!

This little story has entertained many over the years and always at my embarassing expense. I can't begin to count how times I've heard lines from so called friends like; how many times did he resell the same course to you? A cosmic joke? I think so.

It's things like this that have led me to believe that life is not meant to be taken so serious. If it's one big cosmic joke then I want to be in on it. And if my head is full of hot air as many have long suspected...so what? When my life on this planet is done, the least they will say of me is...the fool sure had a good time!

Smile, and people will think you are in on the joke!

The more you give....

"You can always tell a true friend. When you've made a fool of yourself she doesn't think you've done a pernament job"

If you were to ask me, what is the one principle to live by that will make your life fun, easy and abundant? I would say surround yourself with givers. Having friends who are givers is the cherry on top of life's meaning.

5 Benefits of having givers as friends (there are many more of course)

1. There is no such thing as it's my turn. No need to keep track of who did what because givers love giving.

2. Givers give off positive energy. Their positive energy lifts you up and makes you feel good about yourself.

3. Givers make you want to be a better person.

4. Givers are happy people and that happiness can be contagious.

5. Someone always has your back. Just knowing that when you stumble someone will put out a hand is very reasurring. If you are being criticised in your absence someone will defend you.

6. Having givers as friends means a life of pleasant surprises. You never know what will be given to you for no reason other than that you are loved. (OK I know that makes six but what the hey, I just felt like giving a little more)

Takers

Avoid these people like you would an unnecessary root canel. The first sign you are with a taker is that their conversation revolves around me me and me. No matter where the conversation goes they find a way to make it about themselves. They will use you and abuse you. They are self centered and immature . They believe that in order for them to succeed they need to take from others. These people are toxic to your happiness.

Fools

The fools are takers but don't know it. They may see themselves as givers but they suck the energy out of you. They may make you a supper but then they dump every morsel of their problems on your plate. These are people who as I said appear to be givers but are so negative that they are draining to be around.

Fakers

The fakers are the ones that calculate that if they give they will get something back. They only give because they think it will gain them something now or down the road. They will fool you but mostly they fool themselves.

What if I haven't been a giver but I want to change?

The answer is simple...give until it feels good!

Guru Rules of The World

Many years ago I came across a list entitled, 'Rules of the World'. It purported to explain how the world worked. If you followed it's teachings then your life would be much easier. I thought it was excellent but being me, I couldn't resist the temptation to write my own set of rules.

Here is my creation! Let me know what you think?

"life is a game

play it well

and have some fun"

Psssst.......if you like this, why not share it with your Facebook friends? Just hit the f button below. Thanks!

The Seducers Favorite Toy

"a good surprise is the unexpected joy of being alive"   

There is a sudden joy, that hits us when we are the recipients of a happy surprise. That joy leaves us feeling, alive, vibrant and appreciated (if only for moments). Seducers understand the power of surprise. That so many don't, is good news for us. After all, if everyone understood and utilized surprise, there would be little magic left in it.

"a life without surprises is called boredom"    

It is at these too infrequent moments of surprise, that we rediscover our inner child. Moments when we can once more feel the awe and wonder, that a child experiences daily. So appreciative are we, that it is hard to control the desire to reiprocate. Mere gratitude seems insufficient. And remember the goal of seduction is to entice life to give us what we desire. This is pure gold.

"a pleasant surprise keeps us coming back in the hopes of another one"

It is interesting to understand what is going on in the brain's pleasure center when it is experiencing surprise. Social scientists, with the aid of MRI's have measured the reaction when we experience surprise. Then they measured the reaction when the same pleasure was not anticipated (surprise). The reaction is significantly stronger when the pleasure was not anticipated. This explains why gambling can be so addictive. This is powerful stuff.

"a good seducer always has a good surprise up her sleeve"

The price of adulthood for most is boredom. Life becomes predictable and routine. We yearn for excitement and adventure. This is why even a small surprise can have a big payback. The most cherished memories are most often a result of surprise. The effort someone made to pull off a surprise, makes us feel appreciated and loved.

It amazes me that business leaders and politicians haven't figured out the benefits of surprising customers and constituients. That friends so rarely make the effort to surprise each other is another head scratcher. Even more fun is to surprise total strangers. And this is why us seducers have an unfair advantage...SURPRISE!

"a good surprise can cost little in money and effort and yet be remembered for a long time"

Awhile back I printed out a card. I keep several in my wallet at all times. I give the card mostly to strangers (ok, usually women). I give it show my appreciation for good service or just because someone made me smile. It always comes as a surprise and trust me, the effect can be amazing. Now because I like you sooo much, I'm going to share it with you. Please use it only for good...

When I said a good seducer always has a surprise up his sleeve, this is one of mine. It's gotten me more hugs, free coffee, drinks and reactions than you can imagine. Best of all, it has made a lot of people feel really good about themselves.

"it has been said that a woman can live off of a good compliment for days. What they didn't say is that a woman can live off of a good surprise for months"

Many folks have misunderstood surprise, they think for it to be effective it needs to be grand. Not so. Many small surprises are more effective than one grandiose display. And surprise has a shelf life, so if you think your surprise is going to seduce indefinitely, you are going to be disappointed. Surprise is a game that is so much fun, it needs to be played over and over again!