Thursday, January 9, 2014

One simple rule guaranteed to make you more persuasive and likeable

"To listen is to be willing to be changed or persuaded by what we hear"
Only when the other person perceives that they are honestly being listened to will they really hear what we are saying.  When we feel we are not listened to we build resistance to the other persons thoughts. 
We are all guilty of waiting for the other person to finish so that we can have our say.   While they are talking most of us are busy not listening and instead forming our next thoughts.   The easy solution is....
The 50% Rule
Make sure the other person gets to speak at least 50% of the time.  Simple!  And if you let the other person speak 70 to 80% of the time guess what happens....
*  You start to build rapport
*  They like you more
*  They think you are smarter
*  The feel appreciated
*  Their resistance to you and your ideas drops
*  They will really listen to you
Isn`t that beautiful and all you have to do is stop talking!
Listen to learn
It is easier to persuade if you know where the other person is coming from.   Ask questions, ask lots of questions.   This gets you the information you need to persuade. The guy that talks the most usually walks away feeling satisified and comfortable.   Whose comfort is more important to you.
The first objective of persuasion is to find ways to lower their resistance to you and your ideas and requests.   This is the easiest path to preparing someone to be persuaded.  
Talk less to be more persuasive and likeable!

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